Dear,

As you have made some good progress on this new outline, and given that you have had so many returns on this assignment, I am passing your outline so you can begin work on your essay.

However, I pass this outline with reservations, as you still have some important revisions to make before this outline will help you write a passing Compare / Contrast essay.

The biggest change you must make is to your thesis. Please see the rubric comment
(highlighted in yellow) under the “Thesis, Ideas, and Content” section of the rubric below.

Review all other rubric and marginal comments for further guidance on where to improve. Good luck as you begin your essay, and please contact the school with any questions.

Instructor (VGG) Penn Foster

English 300: Advanced Composition
Comparison and Contrast Prewriting

	Pass	Return	
Thesis, Ideas, and Content
-The thesis makes a focused claim that can be sustained in a longer essay.
No—this is the biggest area for needed revision. Right now, your thesis itself is not appropriate for the exam, nor does the stated thesis relate to your actual analysis of each changes’ significance. The unifying thread between all your analyses seems to be related to how readers of the book and viewers of the movie relate to or sympathize / empathize with the characters. (You seem to suggest in all instances that the book allows us to connect to, care about, and/or root for the characteristics in a way that the movie does not, due to all its changes; so, a statement of this argument should be your thesis statement.)
-The outline/organizer provides a close reading of book and film using comparison and contrast patterns of development.
Yes—you have a great start in this area overall, though you will need more evidence and examples in several instances in order to fully prove the
differences that lead to your analysis.
-The main points analyze the significance of the changes between book and film.
Yes, though some of your analyses need further development, and all of your analysis will need to be used to prove a single, unified thesis argument.	
X (w/
reservations)		
Organization
-Ideas are logically arranged and help move paper forward.	
X		

-Each proposed main point is focused on one aspect of the topic	and helps				
support the thesis statement.			
Style and Voice
-Maintains a consistent point of view on topic
No—you will need a unified thesis to help your paper cohere.
-Proposed evidence will engage readers’ interest in the topic.	
X (w/
reservations)		
Bibliography
-Properly formatted using MLA guidelines.
-Provided six potential outside sources for research.	
X		
Conventions
-The outline/organizer has been spell-checked and proofread to check for
errors in word choice and typos.
-The paper is reasonably free of errors that interfere with a reader’s ability to
understand the content.	
X		
Format
-The prewrite is developed as an outline or graphic organizer.
- It includes all required information in a properly formatted header.	
X		

Exam Number: 	Grade:

Date: 	Instructor:

IMPORTANT NOTICE
Along the right-hand side of your evaluated exam, you should see marginal or "bubble" comments from your instructor. You should also see a series of highlighted numbers in the evaluation chart identifying the rating you earned on each trait. If you don't see this feedback, click on the "View" tab and "Print Layout" or click on "Review" and the option "Final Showing Markup." If you
still cannot see the feedback, please contact the school for the complete evaluation.

“The Host”

THESIS/INTRODUCTION–    In the book, The Host, The Earth has been overtaken over by

“The Host,” a race of “benevolent” beings who call themselves “Souls” and conquer world after

world by inhabiting the bodies of creature’s native to that particular planet. They then use the

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memories of their Hosst to find and inhabit still more of that race. One teenage girl, however,

poses a problem. Melanie, the teenage heroine of the novel, has a particularly strong mind and an

indomitable will to survive and protect those she loves. She is captured and  ‘infused’ with an

alien Soul called Wanderer, who holds great respect among her people, having inhabited beings

on no less than eight different planets and had eight Hosts, more than any other being of their race. Melanie fights this takeover fiercely, guarding every memory. When the Seeker who found her grows impatient with the lack of progress in gaining Melanie’s memories, she arranges to have Wanderer removed from Melanie with plans to bond with her herself in order to gain the
memories. Melanie is able to convince Wanderer to flee and they head across country to a

landmark Melanie remembers her Uncle telling her about. Things don’t go as planned, however, and the car crashes leaving Wanderer/Melanie with only a bottle of water to try and make it across the desert to her Uncles safe place.  Eventually, Wanderer/Melanie is found, half dead, by Melanie’s Uncle. Although it is clear she has been inhabited, she is taken in anyway. What follows is a story of learning to accept, learning to live, and learning what love and loyalty truly are and what they can do.

Thesis – The differences between the book “The Host” and the movie taken from it were made mostly in an attempt to compact a 300 page novel into a two hour movie and were designed to disrupt the actual story plot as little as possible.

I. 	BODY – Book Vs. Movie

Commented [GGV1]: This much detail is not needed (nor effective) for the introduction. Instead, condense all these specific ideas down to the main points. Then, within each body paragraph, if you need additional specifics in order to make your points, then include that information.
Commented [GGV2]: Why the changes were made is not relevant (and this point is an obvious one). You do not have an interesting, debatable thesis here, and so this thesis attempt is not viable for this assignment.

Consider, for instance, the thesis you were working toward with your previous book and movie choice. Arguing that the book version showed one view or takeaway regarding rich people and the movies showed another is 1) interesting and
2) something you would need to prove. That is why that thesis would work. Here, your thesis says only that the book and movie tried to be very similar, which is typical / obvious. There is nothing interesting to say about that.

Instead, your thesis must list the three or more types of differences you will discuss (plot, character, etc.) and then assert what you will argue is the effect or significance of all those changes.

A.  Points of Difference - In the film, unlike in the book, Melanie and  Wanda ’s   Wanderer’s

relationship is built through flashbacks and voiceovers by Melanie. In the book, the

relationship between the two is developed quite slowly and very deliberately through an unfolding narrative of the overtaking of the earth by Wanderer’s people and very effective storytelling with Melanie fighting for her “life” inside Wanderer’s head, giving feedback and protesting every memory of her life on earth that surfaces and becomes available to Wanderer. In the film however, it is more quickly established by rather disjointedly placed flashbacks of Jared (Melanie’s lover) and Melanie together, coupled with often angry voiceovers by Melanie as her past resurfaces into Wanderer’s mind
B.  Significance - Although the method used in the movie allows a more personal take on the struggle between Melanie and Wanderer for dominance in Melanie’s body, the method utilized in the book allows the reader to understand more about both Wanderer and her
people, as well as about Melanie, and this is done simultaneously. Unfortunately,

although the creators were obviously striving to “mesh” the two personalities more

quickly, to further these ends, they were forced to leave out vital information about

Wanderer’s people that helped to make more sense out of the invasion and their methods

of takeover.

C.  Character development in the movie is rushed.  Typical of Stephanie Meyer’s style, the

Commented [GGV3]: Okay—so, are you saying that you want to argue that the movie is difficult to understand? Or that we cannot relate to Wanderer and her people as much in the movie as in the book? This is interesting analysis, but it must be tied to a specific, overall thesis argument.

characters in the book, even the side characters, are fully fleshed out and show the depth

and range of human emotion.  The relationships formed by the characters are created and

explored fully, even unto the, rather admittedly, strange combination of the human, Ian,

who falls in love (mutual, of course) with Wanderer. In contrast, most of those in the

movie, save for Wanderer/Melanie and, perhaps, Jared, are left almost one-dimensional;

Commented [GGV4]: Give evidence and examples to prove this is the case, including quotes form the book.

the forming relationships is  strained and sometimes making little sense.  The romances

between the two main couples; Ian and Wanderer and Jared and Melanie seem especially

rushed and therefore, unrealistic. .

D.  Significance - Because not as many character traits are revealed in the movie, the
audience does not have the chance to ‘know’ the characters as well as they are allowed to through the book. The more characterization that is present, in any form of media, the

Commented [GGV5]: What about their development is rushed? This is your analysis / point, but you need actual evidence and examples to prove this point.

more well–rounded and complex the characters will be. This increases the sense of

realism for the reader, or watcher. In contrast, characters that are not well developed will come off as being flat or as being mere stereotypes.
E.    Me la ni e  an d  Wander er ’s  r e la ti ons hip  c han ges  fr om  r iv alry  ta  fr ie nds hi p  muc h  m ore 

quickly and, if  disjointedlyy, in the movie than in the book. When Wanderers Soul is

Commented [GGV6]: Not necessarily the sense of realism, as some people in real life actually are quite one- dimensional. But I think knowing the characters more helps us connect with them. So, figure out how to work this idea into your thesis statement.
Commented [GGV7]: And then, as a result, how do we feel about those characters?

inserted into Melanie and Melanie becomes aware of what has happened, she expresses a deep hatred of not just Wanderer, but all Souls. She lets this hatred be known very loudly from within the mind that, according to what the Souls believe, is now supposed to be
exclusively Wanderers. When Wanderer realizes that Melanie has not and apparently will

not disappear as she “should,” she is quite frightened of this overwhelmingly strong

human personality that still resides within a body that should be hers alone. These things

Commented [GGV8]: How do you know? Provide evidence for this important point.

remain basically the same in both the book and the movie, although Wanderer’s fear is

greatly downplayed in the movie. This feeds into the next change. The relationship between Wanderer and Melanie, in the book, develops over time, gradually segueing

Commented [GGV9]: How do you know? How is the fear portrayed in the book (specifically), and how is the fear portrayed in the movie (specifically)?

from their intense dislike of each other, to tolerance, and eventually into a strong

friendship. This  is transition is very rushed in the movie (necessarily so, as it is only a

Commented [GGV10]: How so? Explain.

two hour movie created from a 300 page book.) Their relationship also seems to waver

from one extreme to the other, with them being enemies one moment then friends the next.
F.  Significance - This being a major aspect that concerns the development of the main character(s) of the book and the movie, this transition is crucial to the story. Stephanie Meyer has created Wanderer as almost a sympathetic character and writes in a way that makes us sympathize with her. Melanie is the obvious victim, a member of our own species who has been invaded. With her, we readily empathize. This is made more difficult by the love triangle they find themselves in, with Ian being in love with
Wanderera (who is in Melanie’s body) and Jared being (still) in love with Melanie, who

he can’t even see or communicate with, but knows is there. Like it or not, their

relationship comes to matter to the reader/watcher. Over time, we come to like them both

and thus crave a happy ending for both. Their relationship colors the entire view of the

ongoing story.

Commented [GGV11]: Okay—so, we like everyone in the book because we get to know them, but not in the movie, since the relationships are so rushed?

II. 	BODY – Plot Points

A.   The book makes the takeover much more of a personal story than does the movie In the

book, we are treated to the personal thoughts of Wanderer as she awakes in a strange

body with emotions she has never felt the like of before. We are privy to her inner thoughts as she struggles with Melanie’s consciousness and to Melanie’s anger and determination to keep her family safe and secret. Knowledge of the depth of the bond of love between Jared and Melanie and her love for her little brother, Jamie, is bestowed on us vividly in the book. Both Melanie’s and Wanderer’s turmoil as they exist with the “wild” humans are made clear. We are keenly aware that Wanderer, now Wanda, is forming bonds of affection with these humans, thanks, in part, from the emotions that are now “hers” because Melanie is a part of her. In the movie, we never even learn of Wanderer’s initial reaction to being human and, though her struggle with Melanie is addressed via voiceover, it simply does not translate to the movie with the powerfulness that is present in the book. Most of Wanderers (Wanda’s) thoughts and feelings as she struggles to fit in with the “wild” humans is touched on only superficially in the movie.
B.   Significance - The differences between how the book vs. the movie are able to portray

these aspects of depth was, perhaps, unavoidable. There is only so much that dream sequences, flashbacks and voiceovers can do. The depth of empathy created in the book between the main character(s), Melanie and Wanda, is not easily translatable to the big screen. Unfortunately however, the lack of access to these thoughts and emotions greatly influences the bond of attachment the reader/audiences is able to form with the characters. While the movie is able to get audiences to like Wanderer and want things to turn out well for her, they simply do not have the opportunity to experience the intensity of that bond supplied in the book.

C.   In the movie, as opposed to the book, we learn very little of the history of Wanderers

people. In the book, Wanda is not just a Traveler among her people, but also a Historian

who is so respected that she has been given an honorary professors position among her people  She keeps the history of their race within her. In the book, one of the major ways that smooths Wanda’s way into being assimilated and accepted into the “wild” human’s community is the hours that she spends in the kitchen and dining area with members of the group, through which she is able to share the history of her people as well as tales of her travels. The humans are intensely fascinated by her and ask endless questions about her people, herself in particular and the worlds on which she has lived as well as the effect the invasion of the Souls had on each one of them.  This very important section of
the book is almost totally left out in the movie, leaving a gaping hole in our knowledge of this invading race.
D.   Significance  Wanda’s evening sharing of memories allows us, as the readers, to learn,

along with the characters in the book, some of the history and experiences of what it is like to be a Soul. It serves to give us some insight to the goals and motives of this alien race. Although this knowledge does not excuse what they have or are doing either in the eyes of the community or the reader, it does provide an awareness of how things are perceived from the “other side.”

III. 	BODY – Most Significant Difference

A.   We are shown more of the outside activities of the rebels in the movie than we are in the

book. Once Wanderer/Melanie reach and are taken in by the “wild” humans, the book

then focuses almost exclusively on the events that are happening in the caves and the process of Wanderer’s (Wanda’s) assimilation into the community. Although the occasional trips out of the caves to obtain supplies or to do reconnaissance are mentioned, the book never follows these characters on their journeys or gives insight into exactly what happens while they are outside. In the movie, however, we do follow characters out of the cave and into the real world. In one significant event, several of the men have gone on a foraging run to locate and steal food and supplies for their underground community. While out, they are spotted by Seekers. (Seekers are the Souls version of police whose
job it is to locate and bring in “wild” humans for the insertion of a Soul.) Two of the group, Aaron and Brandt, commit suicide by running into the side of an overpass rather than being taken as Hosts. This serves the dual purpose of providing a distraction so the others can get away and of preventing their bodies from ever being useful to the Souls
B.  Significance- By accompanying the group that goes outside, we are given more of a feel for exactly what it means to be a human hiding amongst the Souls who have taken over. We are able to see the tougher, grittier part of the struggle for survival of the few “wild” humans left and experience with the characters the very real fear of being captured and having their bodies forcibly invaded by one of the Souls; the intense aversion of the remaining humans to becoming a host and how far they are willing to go to prevent this from happening. This has the effect of bringing the audience more fully (emotionally)

into the dystopian world of “The Host” and causes them to be more invested in the

humans winning the day.

IV: CONCLUSION

Thesis –  T he  diffe re nc es  be twe e n  t he  book  “T he  H os t”  a nd  the  movie  ta ken  f rom  it  we re  ma de 

mostly in an attempt to compact a 300 page novel into a two hour movie and were designed to

disrupt the actual story plot as little as possible.

As a dystopian novel, the novel brings up a good point and several questions.. Should such a thing as an invasion of an alien species occur, are we ready? Would many survive of just a few of us, leaving only small pockets of resistance? Would that be enough to save our world? In short, just because humans always win in the movies doesn’t mean that in real life we would come out victorious. This book/movie and those like it, though viewed as simple entertainment, also serve as a kind of “early warning system” to those who know to listen.

Student Name: Megan Doty Student ID: 21648276 Exam Number: 50046900
11 Sandhill Crane Court Oakley, CA 94561 meghanbelsher@gmail.com

Bibliography

Luciano, L. (2013). 5 Things You Should Know about "The Host". Latina, 28-30.

McKinney, S. (n.d.). "The Host". Retrieved from Love Vampires; A Dedicated Vampire Fiction Site:
http://lovevampires.com/smthehost.html

Meyer, S. (2010). The Host. Boston: Back Bay Books.

Rawden, J. (2013, March 29). The Host: 10 Big Differences Between the Book and the Movie. Retrieved from Cinema Blend: http://www.cinemablend.com/new/Host-10-Big-Differences-Between- Book-Movie-36675.html